Gravity by Gary Hainsworth

If someone picks a fight with nature by jumping off a cliff, bet on gravity to win every time. Now that I think about it, generally speaking, it is also a good strategy to bet against human arrogance in its various incarnations.

Klendathu...Oh Yeah by Gary Hainsworth

If Basil Poledouris’ "Klendathu Drop" from the movie "Starship Troopers" (1997) isn’t playing while you’re making love you’re not doing it right. You're probably not doing life correct either.

Let them Eat Brioche by Gary Hainsworth

June 2016, revised August 2022

My question is this: When Louis XVI's Austrian wife Marie Antoinette (1755-1793) said 'let them eat cake,' did she say that in French or German? Assuming she said it at all, which doesn't appear to be the case, though, if it were some sources purport that she did so at the age of five. Five. As in five years old. As in somewhere between the age of a preschooler and someone school aged. Ostensibly a kindergartner, to borrow a term largerly absent the 18th century she loved but common place the 19th one she never lived to see, and condemned for saying  "Qu'ils mangent de la brioche" or "Lass sie Kuchen essen." 

Kuchen retneders to cake in the German tongue from a French one and means about the same thing. However, the original word itself, la brioche, does not. Brioche itself isn't necessarily equivalent to the word 'cake.' Le gâteau, La tarte, la pâtisserie, or possibly la croquette, would suffice for better analogs to the English word for cake with Le gâteau the most analagous, but broiche beggars clarification as to what context allows such a translation from the French to English to be possible let alone so persistent to historical posterity. 

Perhaps an answer can be provided. Brioche, the word and the type bread of its label refers, has no direct equivalent in the English tongue or in the English kitchen as it does the French of either. Saying 'light, eggy, creamy, buttery, and slightly puffy sweet bread' doesn't sound as reasonable as cake, which might technically be inaccurate or misleading, but seems to be so within the proverbial ballpark that attempting to create an English version of the word 'brioche' instead of adopting of the French and making it an English cognate seems to be more trouble then its worth. 

'Let them eat broiche' doesn't sound good, but neither does it sound absurd either, which is the point of this possibly fraudulent motto about something Antoinette allegedly said. However, such a translation likely wouldn't provoke as much revolutionary zeal. Cake is pretty straightforward. Le broiche not so much. Calling the maxim, 'Qu'ils mangent de la brioche,' 'Qu'ils mangent de le gateau' might theoretically make a better translation, but could also make someone accidentally think they are talking about killing a feline named Marge or believe that Antoinette is saying the equivallent of the English word 'let them eat cookies,' which, if said by a five year old version of Antoinette, is much more reasonable then if she states the same thing at thirty-five. 

Let them eat cookies is exactly the kind of thing one would expect a five year old to say when first being introduced to the idea of famine, poverty, and the like. 'Well, why don't they just eat cookies instead?' Naïve, most definitely but perhaps not so worthy of derision and rebuke, then if it had been said by a girl significantly older. A reductive solution, but not outside the pedagogic perimeters to be expected of a young child that age, especially one that grew up in the lap luxury. Now if it is true that she 'let them eat cake' or the equivalent phrase in French and German mentioned above, then the comment itself reads less like an example of out of touch elitism and more like saccharine naivety from a literal child not quite able to grasp with the complexities of the world. 

The aforementioned phrase itself certainly doesn't roll of the tongue or pen with nearly as much ease. 'Let them eat light, eggy, creamy, butter, and slightly puffy sweet bread,' from "Qu'ils mangent de la brioche" doesn't have the right ring, which is possibly where the German Kuchen comes in and the English takes cues from the German translation. 

If Antoinette did say this oft-attributed quote then she did so somewhere between the ages of 5 and 34 since it's unlikely she said it after the French Revolution, during the Reign of Terror, or anytime after she was decapitated by the guillotine.

Imagine being s*** on for some out of touch, seemingly emotional tone-deaf comment you made when you were five years old. Assuming you said it at all, which remains debated. 

Oxymoron by GARY Hainsworth

Who is Oxy and why are people always mentioning his lack of his intelligence? Figures of speech are so bizarre.

Ibid by Gary Hainsworth

July 2016, updated August 2022

Ibid must have been an incredible intellect. Maybe the most extraordinary mind ever produced by this or any society of any era. How could they not be the most-immense intellect ever produced by the Homosapien species? Ibid is cited in numerous books and research papers too massive to count, let alone correctly capture into a multi-volume bibliographic of everything that Ibid has ever written or got written about him. 

Ibid's very old, too, arguably ancient. He's even mentioned in books many centuries old and is likely to be directly referenced or alluded to as an authority in hitherto unwritten works to come. Talk about longevity and also connectivity to the past and future as well. Ibid has become so authoritative a source that a researcher using most citation formats, such as APA, Chicago/Turabian, and MLA, need only cite Ibid and all its derivations. This 'Ibid[.,]' alone without referencing a specific book or page number, and the citation is supported. Ibid said this or that, with the where and when of it all not necessary. Since, when it comes to the great Ibid, all that is required for a citation to be valid is that Ibn said it. Therefore it is.