Ivory Towers by Gary Hainsworth

Life is filled with ivory towers. Ivory towers often require elephants to be sacrficied.

Best Time by Gary Hainsworth

Often it seems that the best time to do your best is when you don't have a choice. 

Seattle's Best by Gary Hainsworth

Seattle's Best is pretty good coffee.

Two Tuxes by Gary Hainsworth

I was in a "David's Bridal" today [May 22, 2016]. There were only two tuxedos in a store that sells wedding and bridesmaid dresses. Both of them were worn by mannequins (none of which were on the move). 

Bad to Worse by Gary Hainsworth

Generally speaking, more of the same will only make a bad thing worse.

Instincts by Gary Hainsworth

Don't let your instincts are get in the way of your happiness, especially if those instincts conspire to inspire unhappiness.

When Standing Still Is Moving Forward by Gary Hainsworth

Occasionally standing still is moving forward. Sometimes the best thing to do in certain situations is nothing at all. Let things heal, let things grow, but don't intervene unless it is absolutely necessary, which it so rarely is.

Bad Bill by Gary Hainsworth

There's an old saying that it is better to prevent a bad bill from becoming law than to allow a good bill through. There appears to be a lot of wisdom to this antique maxim.

Writers Block by Gary Hainsworth

Austrian-born American psychologist Edmund Bergler (1899-1962) invented the term writer's block in 1947, although it has been described by countless other alternative phrases since time immemorial. It is debatable if writers block is real. Burnout on the on-the-other-hand is as real as reality gets and often gets misdiagnosed as writers block.

Accident of Biology by Gary Hainsworth

An accident of biology doesn't neccassarily make you better than anyone else? What you do with that biology does?

Avoid This by Gary Hainsworth

There isn't a lot a person can do if they're in a coma or a coffin so if someone can avoid being in either situation they should do so.

Award-Winning Beef by Gary Hainsworth

I had Award-winning beef today. Apparently, the cow was an exceptional speller.

Butterfly by Gary Hainsworth

I'd like to think that the purpose of life is to end up a butterfly and not remain a caterpillar.

Cute As A Button by Gary Hainsworth

Where does the expression: cute as a button come from? I've never found buttons to be that adorable or some such synonym by any measure. Maybe during some time immemorial they used to be the way sliced bread was once an impossible fantasy.

Optimism by Gary Hainsworth

Optimism is a virus everyone should want to catch.

Useful Myths by Gary Hainsworth

A useful myth will never die, though it may ebb and flow depending on its perceived popularity. It will long endure no matter how many times has been discredited or proven to have been rooted entirely in falsehood. Uptown Sinclair, an author who was an examplar of Victor Hugo's advice to 'never let the truth get in the way of a good story,' once said that "It is difficult to get a man to understand something[,] when his salary depends on his not understanding."  If it is someone's interesting to look head on or look away, they will with seemingly unfailing irregularity.

Old Dogs by Gary Hainsworth

There is no greater gift for a dog to give to himself than to teach himself a new trick.

Hawkeye by Gary Hainsworth

Hawkeye has no powers. Instead he's just an insanely good archer. Unless being an insanely good archer is his power the way Black Widow's power is  flexiblity and strength, perchance provided by the same scientists who made Ivan Drago so indestructible. In addition, I also found his standalone movie to be great but very strange when compared to the other movies in the Marvel Cinematic Universe (2008-present). For one, the Hawkeye movie came out in 1992, was set in 1757 during The French and Indian War (1754-1763) and called "Last of the Mohicians", which in turn was based on an 1826 novel by James Fenimore Cooper starring 3-time Academy Award winner Daniel-Day Lewis instead of 2-time Academy Award nominee Jeremy Renner. Then again, 3-time Academy Award nominee Edward Norton played the role of Bruce Banner/Hulk in "The Incredible Hulk" (2008) - the only standalone movie for the Hulk but was later replaced by Mark Ruffalo who has played the character since "The Avengers" (2012). 

Regarding Scripture by Gary Hainsworth

If my understanding of scripture is adequate, it appears that it is permissible to ask g-d to explain himself, and under most circumstances demand consistency (and g-d would not necessarily disapprove). However, for some reason, it is never permissible to ask those who speak for the good lord or act in his name to do the same. I could be wrong about this but I get the feeling that I'm not.

Happiness by Gary Hainsworth

There are different forms of happiness. Some are more appropriate for some than they are for others. What you have to figure out is what makes you happy. Define what happiness is appropriate for you and make sure it does not infringe upon the happiness of others.

The Customer Is Always Right by Gary Hainsworth

Remember: The customer is always right as long as you want their money.

Serenity and Leaving Things to Chance by Gary Hainsworth

There is wisdom in the advice to not stress the things in life you can't control. There are few things that can be, so relax and take the helm of over the things you can. Theologian Reinhold Niebuhr (1892-1971) beautifully encapsulated the concept when he wrote for a long-ago sermon what has come to be called the Serenity Prayer, a staple maxim alluded to in 12-step programs: "God grant me the serenity to accept the things I cannot change, the courage to change the things I can and the wisdom to know the difference." In other words, change what you can and leave the rest to chance.

Bourgeoisie by Gary Hainsworth

Bourgeoisie is just another way of saying middle class. 

Aristocrat by Gary Hainsworth

Aristocrat is just another way of saying 'Doesn't Require a Job' in order to live comfortably. It is also ten out of the fourteen letters that form the punchline to vaudeville's most baffling off-color joke: The Aristocrats.

Stealing Candy from a Baby by Gary Hainsworth

Whoever said that it is 'as easy as stealing candy from a baby' is either guessing or they do have a disturbing expertise indeed. Either way, you shouldn't listen to them because there is a credibility gap.

The Number Two Cause of Drowning in the Antediluvian World by Gary Hainsworth

In the times of Noah and the flood, sneezing was considered the number one cause of death. Drowning was a close second.

Taker by Gary Hainsworth

In all probability, whoever was the first person to say that "It is better to give than to receive" was a taker. 

Salesman by Gary Hainsworth

A salesman Once said that "My integrity is not for sale -- but everything else must go."

Math: Fantasy Buster by Gary Hainsworth

Math has the ability to destroy fantasies, which is probably why most people hate it. Also, because its damn difficult in its own right unless you have the aptitude for it.

Failure by Gary Hainsworth

You generally only feel like a failure if you have a some semblance success to compare yourself to.

Age by Gary Hainsworth

My age is my age. Wisdom sold separately.

Nuclear Winter by Gary Hainsworth

If there's ever a nuclear winter, I would hate to be around to shovel that radioactive snow.

French by Gary Hainsworth

If it weren't for William the Bastard I probably wouldn't know any French.

Money Can't Buy Me Love by Gary Hainsworth

They say that money can't buy you love, but try getting the things you like for free. 

Ebb and Flow by Gary Hainsworth

Ebb and flow is the governing principle behind all life and all progress. Remembering that the only certainties in life are change itself is not only good advice but essential too. In other words, hedge your bets on change every time. 

Juvenal by Gary Hainsworth

1st/2nd century Roman poet/satirist Juvenal has a point. Who watches the watchmen? Can they really be trusted to watch themselves? One way or the other, do I even want to know?

Reading by Gary Hainsworth

It is incumbent upon me to inform the reader, assuming they are not already aware of this, that a man who does not read is a man deprives himself an essential tool necessary to hack life itself.

Is A Picture Worth A Thousand Words by Gary Hainsworth

If a picture is worth a thousand words, how many words will there be when you have twenty-four pictures running sixty times a minute for two hours on average? It seems that when it comes to pictures, and their conversion rate to words, there has to be a point where the law of diminishing returns takes effect, right? How can approximately 150,000-200,000 words be cannot be contained within a two-hour movie when most movies adapted from books are often a significant fraction of the length of their source material?

Humanity As-Is Or Not At All by Gary Hainsworth

Any new school of thought which requires a new version of humanity to exist before it can properly work as a system is a school of thought guaranteed to fail. You either take humanity as-is flawed and all or discard whatever change that is attempting to change the status quo to something Utopian and ultimately impossible.

Add A Step, Remove A Step by Gary Hainsworth

The following is not a cure-all, but I find that it holds true in most situations. This quasi-panacea goes as follows: If you want a good habit to succeed remove a step. If you want a bad one to fail add a step.

Bag of Crazy by Gary Hainsworth

In some ways, everyone is looking for a place to hang up their particular bag of crazy and occasionally let it loose in a safe way.

Happiness: Sabotage by Gary Hainsworth

Happiness is a considerable obstacle in the way of being miserable all the time. Smiling is sabotaging a frown.

The Value of a Vote by Gary Hainsworth

I believe that there is a question implicilitly asked during every election: Why vote in an election when it is obvious who is going to win it? Should an individual only vote when the outcome is uncertain or is their an inherent value in going with the motions? In other words, is their significance in casting a vote regardless of how it impacts a particular election?

Clouds or Fail Trying by Gary Hainsworth

We must reach the proverbial clouds or metaphorically fall trying. 

Calmer by Gary Hainsworth

You tend to be a lot calmer when you know that everything that should work does and will, in all probability, continue to remain working far into the foreseeable future.

Superior Value by Gary Hainsworth

It could be said that we have superior virtue when and only if we do not offer inferior value.

A Limit to Delusions by Gary Hainsworth

There are no limits to our delusions and fantasies except one: the floor, ceiling and walls of reality.

The Futility of Trying to Escape Yourself by Gary Hainsworth

There is a futility of trying to run away from throne person that will always follow us. Chase us, as it were. No matter how hard we try we can never escape ourselves. Many have tried and those that did have failed by one way or another.

You're Only As Good As Your Last Job by Gary Hainsworth

Correct me if I am mistaken but it seems that the goal of an actor, editor, writer, model, musician and so forth is to get rehired. If this is the case, you're only as good as your next job, which is highly contingent on how you perform on your last one.

Post Facto and Ex-Ante by Gary Hainsworth

Is it possible that post facto justifications are just an excuse, or that anything ex-ante is only a guess?

Objectivity by Gary Hainsworth

Try to get rid of anything that is a serious deterrent against your objectivity and your ability to be objective and stay that way.

Theme to Never Ending Story by Gary Hainsworth

Christopher Hamill, also known as Limahl, of Kajagoogoo, performed more than just the theme song to "The Never Ending Story" (1984). However, these days it would appear that the world does not care much who performed the song to the song composed by Giorgio Moroder with lyrics by Keith Forsey for a wonderfully bizarre German film by the director of "Das Boot" (1981). That's unfortunate because "Turn Your Back On Me" and "Too Shy" are good songs in their own right.

For Shizzle by Gary Hainsworth

Never forget that it is "for shizzle" not "for shame". So try not to do anything that would cause you to feel "for shame" when you can feel "for shizzle" instead. E-40 would have it no other way...probably.

Live Action Simpsons by Gary Hainsworth

Random thought: If they ever made a live-action Simpson's movie Gary Oldman would make a great Ned Flanders.

The Plot to the Upcoming Black Panther Movie by Gary Hainsworth

Here's the plot to the upcoming Black Panther movie. 

Black Panther, King of Wakanda, goes to Queens (get it, Queens, because he's a king  -- pun). He goes there in order to find a wife whom he can respect for her intelligence and will. 

While there Black Panther, with his sidekick, Semmi, both work for a McDonald's rip-off -- for now let's call it McDowells (but that is always subject to change).  What is not subject to change is that he falls in love with his new boss' daughter Lisa. 

In addition, they tell people that they attended the University of the United States, and Black Panther himself has to compete for the affections of the woman he has chosen with the heir to a hair care products fortune -- a Slow Glo if you will. 

If you haven't guessed that I'm not being serious by now, you've been psyched.

The Two Most Important Four-Letter-Words by Gary Hainsworth

The most two important four-letter-word's to making your dreams come true is cash and hope.

Success by Gary Hainsworth

I'm not entirely sure what success is. However, I do know fact that sucess is not your neighbors driving expensive cars they can't afford. It definitely is not whether you have a nice sounding job with a good title or they do. It is not trying to catch up to the illusion they created or continue to prop up yourself. It definitely is not wishing to be what they can only claim to be.

Resources by Gary Hainsworth

In my opinion, using resources without adding any form of value is probably a form of stealing.

Loyalty to Ideals by Gary Hainsworth

Be loyal to your ideals even if that loyalty might cause others to betray you. 

Truth About Truth by Gary Hainsworth

Generally speaking, people only turn to the truth when lies betray them and falsehood ceases to be an option.

Two Types of Writers by Gary Hainsworth

There are two types of writers. Those who actually write and those who just talking about doing it one day.

The Fragility of Hope and Faith

Hope and faith can be a fragile thing. Try not to be a sledgehammer.

Life Goals by Gary Hainsworth

Life goals are not just nice things to have but a most.

A Thought About The Ancient One and Idris Elba by Gary Hainsworth

This whole thing has gotten out of hand. Sorry to inform you of the bad news: but if you're complaining about the casting of someone in a movie because they are white when they are traditionally another race, or you suppose they should, and for no other reason, you are a racist. In addition to being a racist, you are also a hypocrite if you do not criticize when minorities get parts that traditionally have been played by another race. Period. End of story. Bye-bye.

If you were offended by Rooney Mara playing Tiger Lily but would not have been offended if the same production had decided instead to have Captain Hook played by an actor like Samuel L. Jackson instead, you are a racist. Although, why such a casting decision has never been made before will remain a question that haunts me.

Personally, I don't care if Tilda Swinton is playing the Ancient One, normally an Asiatic male. She's a fantastic actress whose androgynous qualities remind me of a young David Bowie. Of course, this fact has no relevance to my argument at all, perchance could be accused of being entirely irrelevant. However, what is relevant is that this type of complaint is completely biased and cherry-picked. In the same movie, no one complained that Chiwetel Ejiofor is playing Baron Mordo (a Caucasian-ish character). Personally, I don't care. He is a fantastic actor who I've admired since Serenity (2005). If I could turn his voice into butter my bagels would always be delicious.

In the recent Jungle Book adaptation, which is fantastic by-the-way, no one complained that Idris Elba voiced an Indian tiger or that Lupita Nyong'o voiced an Indian wolf. Not that I care. I could listen to them talk for hours. In fact, I looked at Audible to see if such a thing were possible: being able to listen to them for hours. No such luck. Lupita has a Charlie Rose interview and Idris Elba is in the audio version of "Vanity Fair: March 2014: The 20th Annual Hollywood Issue". Please, for the world's sake read a book for Audible or a company like it so we can basque in their speaking voices for several hours without quit. It could be a cookbook for all I care.

I'm confident that Idris Elba has the ability to make a phone book sound compelling or Lupita the ability to make it sound profound, sage-like advice excerpted from an Upanishad. Or the musical Hamilton casting a black actor to play Aaron Burr who was most definitely white and not the same hue as Mos Def. And do I care? Not really because I'm not a baby. Instead, if I want to get my fill of Idris Elba's voice, I will have to binge-watch The Wire up to Season 3 or all four seasons of Luther, which I was playing to do anyway. Speaking of which.

Be The Vote That Got Away by Gary Hainsworth

It is not throwing away your vote to vote for a third party candidate. Here is the reason why. If you don't vote Democrats and Republicans just assume it was a vote they would never have had, and don't despair that they could have gotten your vote if only they somehow courted you and your constituents better. If you had not been the vote that got away.

However, if you vote for a third party candidate and enough people do the same, and the numbers become large enough, they will realize that this is a potential voting bloc they could have utilized. In future elections, aware of this significant chunk of the electorate, they might decide to adjust their policies in the next election, especially if one of the sides would have won if not for the x-amount of votes they could have had...if only. This happened in 1912 when millions of people voted for the Bull Moose Party instead of the Republican Party causing enough votes to be split that a Democrat named Woodrow Wilson was able to take the presidency from William Howard Taft.

During the 1920s, the Democrats were losing election after election: Harding, Coolidge and Hoover defeating Cox, Davis, and Al Smith. Although there was not much of a chance for John W. Davis to defeat Calvin Coolidge, he did lose 4,831,706 votes due to a third party candidate: Robert M. La Follette Sr. of the Progressive Party. Votes he probably could have had. This was not an unusual pattern in American politics at the time. Bill Clinton, who never won more than half of the vote, was able to win in 1992 and 1996 because of Ross Perot.

In 2000, almost three million votes that probably would have gone to Al Gore went  to the Green Party, siphoning away votes that would have gone to the Democratic Party. Considering that Al Gore lost by half a million votes, having those three million would have made all the difference. Voter irregularities in Florida would have largely been irrelevant. Since 2000, the Democrats having adopted the social justice mantra in spades.

Voting for a third party is not throwing away your vote because if enough people vote the opposing parties will have to take notice. In time, they will eventually attempt to absorb that third party platform aware that not doing so might cost them the next election.This might be one of the proven ways to get the changes that you want. However, if you don't go out and vote for conscience, they'll just assume that the reason you didn't vote was because you were in the middle of binge-watching Parks & Recreation and couldn't be bothered to vote.

Prove them wrong.

Slimer by Gary Hainsworth

Am I the only one who wants to know how Slimer died? Was this ever explained at any point? I would like to know this.

The Cure For Idiocy by Gary Hainsworth

Book-reading is the best cure for idiocy. Although there are times when it can be a real pill.

The Essence of Prejudice by Gary Hainsworth

What we know is good and what we do not know is bad. This is the essence of prejudice in a nutshell. Everything else is just details and commentary.

Thinking by Gary Hainsworth

I like 'thinking'. It provides me hours of entertainment for free, and all it asks in return is for a little consistency; and courage from time to time.

Vice-Presidents Don't Have Term Limits by Gary Hainsworth

There are no term limits on vice-presidents, and I think Hillary needs a male to balance the ticket. Therefore, and I may be wrong on this, I think her choice for VP is going to be Joe Biden not Bernie Sanders or Elizabeth Warren, or whomever.